I mean, what is there to say???  ...is my first thought, but I figure I should write something anyways.  I've had a long day.

 

Empathy is important, we all know that, at least on a conceptual level, probably.  But maybe sometimes a calm head and being open to understanding and curiosity are part of it too.  Or maybe it's just the same thing but under a different name.  When people ask "Why?" or say "I don't understand" sometimes the other unsaid half of the sentence is "and I don't like it" or "I think it's wrong".  Starting from an assumption that there is a =mistake= in the world can predispose us to looking only for the answer that we want to see.

But usually things have a good reason that they are the way they are, or even a mediocre reason, at worst.  Sometimes we can shove aside the question of "why" and ignore it in our quest to figure out "how" to move forward with whatever we want, but sometimes maybe you really can get some good insight into "why" if you start by assuming that it is something that DOES make sense, given some sort of missing information that you are not taking into account.  If we give the benefit of the doubt, what are the possible reasonings we could try and derive -- or even contrive -- for "why"?

Why do you have to wait at a red light even when it's 3AM and you're the only car on the road?  We know there are often sensors that are used to detect whether cars are at intersections (and which lanes they're in -- this frequently affects left turn signals).  Why couldn't we use those same sensors to deduce that there is only one car at the intersection and that it should be let through immediately?

There are probably any number of reasons you could guess at here, but consider that pedestrians are probably too light to trip most of these inductive sensors (which are probably designed for cars, right?) and also take significantly longer to cross the road.  It wouldn't be a great situation if someone saw a green light and started to walk slowly across the road, only for cross-traffic to suddenly get switched on.

Of course, all of this applies to our selves too.  We get caught so often in the mistake of assuming that we are "wrong" for our unwanted behavior or that there's no reason for it.  But humans are astoundingly rational creatures, we really do most things for good, or at least important, or sensible, reasons.  You can call your behavior "maladaptive" all you want but there's a reason for those to exist too, right?  Sticking to something that worked in the past is an effective life strategy, it =should= take conscious recalibration and effort to change our working patterns.

 

Anyways, I guess I get at least some credit for today.  I did some work, wrote a letter, came up with a pretty good last-minute birthday gift, scheduled a vet appointment, got some JaSmix stuff resolved even.  This week I decided to break down a whole chicken so that I could have richer parts leftover for some soup, in addition to simply saving some more money.  Cooked two pretty decent meals.  I have a bunch of various things in the fridge that I'll need to try my best to use up before my next trip, I think it should mostly be okay, though.  Have the laundry going...

Failed in delivering a Rhythm Quest devlog this month again, but that's okay, right? ...ehh...

I've got some stuff to do tomorrow, I guess.  More writing, one hour compo, an album release, maybe thinking about anything else that needs to be squared away.  A nail trim.

Perhaps the biggest thing I should be proud about today is releasing some of the tension in my back.  Was sort of nagging at me the entire day, but I've just realized that it's gotten a lot better now.  I always had the inkling that when I get back pain it's a combination of physical soreness and stressors manifesting in pain (previous experiences with psychosomatic issues cluing me in), but this past week perhaps more than other times have convinced me of the existence of the psychosomatic portion of it (thanks therapist!).

Despite everything I may or may not say and write about, I'm doing pretty good.  I got this random comment that I might be having a rough time.  Probably not very informed, but even if it was, probably not an unreasonable conclusion to reach given the energy and mood that my posts these days often have.  There's this constant feeling of "well, life goes on, for now", I basically wrote that in like 3 of my more recent posts?  Well, I mean, it's =true=, though.  I'm not really one to hop and skip my way along, but also not one to dig in my heels or start kicking and screaming, am I?  At my worst maybe I'm slowly plodding, at my best, my steps are probably a little lighter, but we like to try our best to go at a steady pace.  Nothing more, nothing less is needed.  Just what we've always done.