I got my covid booster yesterday; thankfully the side effects didn't seem to be too bad for me this time and I was actually more or less fully functional today.  I had the day off work, so I just did a mix of chores, cooking, some letter writing, Rhythm Quest work, DDR, and some games.

I'm still playing Gran Turismo 4, starting to get into the higher ranked races now, which means cash flow is a lot better in general when I go for those.  Now that I have more money to throw around, I can afford more tuning on my cars, which in turn means the gaps in my tuning knowledge are starting to show.  I've been abusing save states as I race around, so thankfully I can still win series just fine, but I definitely ran into some stability/steering issues and there were one or two races where admittedly I had to either play it very carefully or just spent portions of the race galloping across the grass because my suspension really wasn't doing the right thing.  I think I maybe have been setting my springs to be too stiff and my ride height =too= low; luckily there is a very nice tuning guide that I've been taking some notes from, they also have a google doc cheatsheet with certified tunings for many of the cars in the game...

Super Metroid practice continues...it's funny that it took me not at all that long to come within a stone's throw of 50 minutes, but getting that sub-50 run is taking forever.  It'll come though, for sure, but for now it's just all about having more practice so I can get better consistency, especially around the boss fights.

I finished watching Initial D (First Stage).  It was enjoyable, but perhaps something I find myself thinking about an unexpected amount is the main character, Takumi Fujiwara.  He's a sort of uncommon protagonist.  You wouldn't think of it since he's got the whole plot armor thing going where he wins every race, so he might come across at first as that "natural genius" sort of character.  I guess to some extent he is, but at the same time, his "apathy" really sets him apart.  He's not some "super cool" type character who unleashes hidden powers, rather he has a genuine lack of interest in racing and the whole "scene" that his friends happen to be into.

And I think that's fascinating because to me it actually speaks of Takumi's maturity.  It probably doesn't seem so to most, because I think from the outside it's easy to see Takumi and see a person who "hasn't figured it out" yet, in terms of he doesn't seem to know what he wants, doesn't get exicted about things, and is oblivious to a lot of the "car speak" that goes on.  But on the contrary, Takumi is the only character in the series whose motivation comes purely internally.  He doesn't get drawn into wanting to win races because "it's the cool thing to do", he merely considers things based on what he wants.  It's easy to see this as aloofness because we come into watching Initial D as an audience who wants to care about racing cars and going fast, but honestly, I think it's a really big sign of maturity when you can avoid getting sucked into other people's opinions.

It's honestly something that I strive to do more often.  When somebody makes an off-handed joke or a negative comment, it's so tempting to just laugh along because that's socially what you're "supposed to" do.  But it really leaves a bad aftertaste in my mouth when I think about it afterwards.  If someone makes fun of me for not knowing something, should I feel ashamed?  Should I defend myself?  Or should I question why it's supposed to be funny and why I'm supposed to know the thing?  A lot of the times when you hear these "jokes" they aren't actually funny.  Honestly, I wish that I could learn how to take them straight-faced and question them more often.

And that is why I feel like Takumi is..."mature", more so than most of the other characters in the series.  Sure, he's not the most communicative with his thoughts in general, but he's very honest with what he thinks, and he doesn't try to pretend to be anything he's not -- especially not to impress or fit in with others.  I like that.

Before the last race in the series, Takumi is shown doing a lot of thinking, and while everyone else is wondering how he's going to try to win; what the strategies are going to be, Takumi's mind is somewhere else.  "I wonder what will happen after this race?", he wonders.  And I just don't think anyone else we see in the series has the maturity to think about that question.  In their minds, winning equals good, and losing equals bad, so of course, you want to win.  There are all of these imposed reasons like "pride", "legacy", "looking cool", and "proving yourself", but Takumi is thinking more about his life as a whole, and what racing means to him, or doesn't mean to him.  And I think he understands that the true answers to those things are going to come from himself, and not anybody else.

I'm a little worried that if I watch the other seasons of Initial D that Takumi's character will just follow a very predictable development of slowly becoming more and more invested in racing and just find that he cares about it more and more.  Which is fine, I mean, that's very sensible I guess.  But I think that's only really satisfying if he finds interest in it for "the right reasons".  Internally-motivated reasons.