Alright, let's do this...

Today was one of those days where it's easy to feel like I didn't really get anything done, despite actually accomplishing an "ok" amount.  Not stellar, not nothing, just "ok".  It's mostly because the stuff I did didn't really check off any of the boxes I was hoping to, just dealt with other stuff here and there.

I washed and dried my bedsheets and everything, which was long overdue, but while I was at it I realized that I had been in need for a new duvet insert/comforter for a while and decided to do some research; eventually settled on a combo 2-in-1 silk duvet insert set that hopefully will fit the bill.  I may also need a new pillow, but that's perhaps something to tackle a separate day.

I then spent a little time on music production stuff.  I've wanted to turn my attention a little more toward sampling, as I feel like that's an area that I could have more fun with and is a little underexplored for myself personally.  Back in February 2023 I had discovered "Bishbattles" hosted by Bishu and, while the idea of a sample-based competition/music cypher was not new at all, thought it was really cool how creative and diverse people's ideas were when it came to this sort of stuff.

I wasted some time just flipping through and listening to some of the stuff that came out of that, but also spent some time downloading a few new samples and presets, as well as some random stuff to either sample or remix if the opportunity ever arises (Arthur theme, Yu-Gi-Oh theme, etc lol).  I browsed some of the articles on EDMProd as well, they actually have some decent text/image guides with audio examples, which is such a rarity these days when everything is just a youtube tutorial...

For One Hour Compo I ended up doing a Liquid DnB tune, which turned out quite well!  I think it was in 2021 that I started doing experiments with Liquid DnB at all (that was the month where I tried synthwave and trap as well, what a good month for me!  The synthwave stuff really ended up panning out too...).  I feel like I've gotten a really good handle on it now, you can feel the difference when compared to my previous attempts.  Not that those songs were bad or anything, just, this one is a little more authentically liquid dnb, I think I understand a little more what goes into it and how to replicate it, as opposed to before when I was doing something more akin to "dnb drum loop, plus some echoey 9-bit stuff".

Did the groceries too, after a brief DDR session.  I barely had time to play DDR that much and only played singles, but I felt like it had been so long since I played at all and I really wanted some physical motion to get my body going and get some exercise for physical and mental health.  I know I just went to Mission City Swing last night and did some glowsticking there too, but still wanted to get some cardio in...

I ordered 3 new white teas from Grass People Tree a little while ago, excited for those to arrive whenever they can make it to me!

Finished another keyboard build for a friend!  (was waiting for an osume set to come back in stock, which it did!)  This one is a Womier SK65 (aka the Lucky65 v1, v2 comes with a nicer quick-release mechanism but is a little less aesthetically pleasing on the bottom, etc), I ended up having my friend audition a handful of switches and they liked either the KTT Strawberries or the HMX Gachapons I had on hand (with the stock switches coming in third).  Honestly wonder if they would have liked some silent linears, but I unfortunately don't have any on hand...

I went with the KTT Strawberries as that would let the light diffuse a little bit more since the housings are more transparent.  Cool that those switches ended up finding another home after all this time!  The keycaps are Osume Cafe, it's a really nice muted beige/green color scheme, easy on the eyes.

There were like a few other things that I was going to attempt today, like starting on my monthly pixel drawing or doing some Rhythm Quest work, but I just didn't manage to get to them at all.  I didn't really get around to playing the weekly ALTTPR seed or playing any MOO2 or anything like that either, though.

Well, tomorrow is another day off.  I'm hoping to both make some good use of the time but also not feel pressured to do so, lol.  I just...want things to be normal.  No really busy days, no big breaks, just...keeping things steady.

 

I guess some small notes on Pagan Bunny Burn -- I don't care to talk too much about it because I feel like I've been reporting on it to the past like 15 people I had conversations with.  Overall it went well, I think!  Only real bad thing that happened to me was that I was really cold the first night, and also got a cut on my finger, got pinched by one of my tent poles while doing some assembly, but luckily not too bad.  I was happy that people made use of my little letter-writing station, and cooking went "fairly good", not perfect really, but went okay.

Seeing the burn itself was pretty cool, honestly the smaller burn was pretty epic as well, the bigger one almost a little less so because the energy was a bit different, I don't really feel like everyone was really focused on it, lots of people chatting about various things.  I mean, a lot of us were probably just looking at the fire and the embers and all that, but it didn't really feel as unifying of an experience as when the smaller effigy/statue was burning =while= all of the fire poi and all was going on with the music and everything.  But it was cool nonetheless, it's probably the first time I've really seen any sort of flame on that scale (I guess I should count myself lucky).

There were some pretty cool camps there and I feel like I got to experience a good variety of things there -- pickle juice + whiskey shots, a sound bath, black light + 3d glasses exhibit.  Somebody set up a big light-up rubik's cube too, so I had a good time trying to solve it, though of course it was really hard wrapping my head around the controls and of course it's always really hard to translate muscle memory to moves as well.  Was cool to make that connection though, and be the one person at the event who could do a successful solve on it, as well as meet a few kiddos who were getting a bit into cubing.

It was a nice break from everything overall.  It was more fun and enriching than the Portugal trip (which makes sense), but also had the same sense of like, "this was cool, but I also could have lived without this, too".  I guess the Portugal trip was a little less "necessary" for me since I had already been there before and all, this one I felt glad to go.

Now I'm back to trying to make sure I'm catching up and getting back into doing all those things that I do -- groceries, cooking, rhythm quest, alttpr, pixel art, etc etc.  I've got a few other miscellaneous things to take care of too, like sewing a new zipper onto my skirt.  Have to figure out what I want to do with my letter boxes now as well, now that I have some boxes that are all set up for a letter-writing station that I =could= bring to Teance and just leave them as they are.  Dunno...

 

I've been in the background, mulling over like, thoughts about anxious / avoidant attachment behaviors, pain from previous relationships, feelings of insecurity and not-being-good-enough, all that stuff.  I feel like video/audio journaling is something that has seemed helpful for this kind of thing so far, so I may find a time at some point to do some more of that, particularly if I am feeling a little off one of these nights.  I want to get back to a place where my social connections and relations feel like they're thriving and bringing me joy, but at the same time it feels like even though I'm out of "self-preservation" mode after being done with PBB, I'm still sort of just in "self-care mode" where I don't feel like I really have had the time to truly care for myself.  And by that I mean like in various sorts of ways...yes, the cheesy "you are enough" self-love messages and thinking, but also just like, having the time and space to have self-care evenings, whether that means extra skincare, videogames, more tea, or whatever...

It's been another year, I guess -- it certainly feels like it.  A lot has happened...too much, in fact -_-;  I know "growth" is good and nice and all, and like yeah yeah you're supposed to move forward and gain new perspectives and all that, but really...this is not what I signed up for.