About time for another update, I think.

The other week I wrote about the struggle between productivity and "trying to relax".  Of course, as you already know (but probably still struggle with anyways), to be truly relaxed means not just "not working" but also to not worry about having to go back to work.  That I think is a state that is missing from a lot of our lives -- understandably so because in a sense it is that very worry that keeps us from being complacent.

Anyways, I've recalibrated my balance a little more, as well as took a weekend or two to actually take a break, not from my day job, but from what I call my "real job" -- all the other stuff.  I think I needed it.  Ironically, it almost feels like one of the easy ways for me to handle this is to have more "scheduled" relaxation.  Having restful (or at least non-productivity-oriented) time to yourself is perhaps easier when it's a goal rather than a non-goal.

I started to receive correspondence back from the prisoner who I wrote to through the Prisoner Correspondence Project.  They seem like quite a nice fellow and we have perhaps one or two unexpected common interests as well beyond what was obvious from their bio.  Perhaps what strikes me most is how much time this person is already willing to spend on writing to me despite having only heard from me the one time so far.  Admittedly, this is perhaps due to the fact that they probably don't have a lot of other things that they'd otherwise be doing in prison.  But it's still a little eye-opening, to see so plainly how much attention I would receive from this person.  In a way, I am so used to people not following through and not caring to put enough attention forth, that I had forgotten that there is actually a possibility on the other end of the spectrum.  How many unanswered letters had I written to those people who I always wished to write back?  Yet, none of them had "enough time" for me.  Is that just it then?  All along, was my eternal rut simply steeped in the fact that I lived among Silicon Valley workaholics, well-to-do people with friends of their own, and those whose idea of "friend" hardly involved any sense of commitment?

I know I had become one of those people, at one point or another in my history.  But that idea had always repulsed me; had moved me to straighten my course, to model what I believed a person should be like.  In spite of it all.  But I know also that I have never been approachable.  Not in the ill-fated marching band times, nor on the social dance floor.  I hoped, though, that I would put in the missing effort that I never saw.  Maybe I wouldn't, every time.  But I would try.  Just, not so hard as to feel as if I am taken granted for.  =That= is something that I learned in the end was not sustainable.  Despite the fact that I tried anyways, and arguably succeeded at it, for a time.

Erm, anyways.

I finally released Passing You By, thus checking off one more song off the "unreleased" list and into the public, where...I'm sure it will sit forgotten by most.  At least I know my dedicated Patrons care ;)

I went through a bunch of Dead Cells runs to get some missing unlocks, and now I just have to practice and grind it out until I can do a 4BC clear.  Specifically, I'll probably need some additional practice against hand of the king and time keeper.  At least the Cavern enemies don't quite scare me as much as they used to, after getting a little more familiar with them.

Caesar 3 progress continues...I played through a few more peaceful missions, including the dreaded Lugdunum, which is one of the steepest difficulty bumps in the entire campaign, as the layout for that map is not convenient at all.  I've been experimenting a little with my housing blocks, finding some different alternatives that I'm starting to like.  I'm going to have to experiment a little more with palace/villa blocks as well.  I've been putting the palaces/villas on the inside of the blocks thus far but I actually think it might be a better idea to put the service buildings on the inside, as that seems more space efficient.  I'll try that on this next map, perhaps.